I’m Here, But My Mind Isn’t

Whisked away on a reminiscent cloud of memory vapor, I inhale deep breathes of satisfactory day dreaming. Each breath a gateway to an imaginary loophole to reality. The faux pás that is reality. Atoms collectively trying to figure out what they are… That is me. Trying to figure out the bigger picture. Stuck in the endless loops of emotion and rationality.

Being a constructive community member is easy. Functioning and dealing with tasks isn’t a problem. However, it tends to be unmotivating when you work alone. Not that it affects my work. It is during these times, though, that I am absorbed into myself, falling hopelessly in dreamy reverie.

And I end up with fictitious conclusions of things that never happened or are very unlikely to happen. It’s not like we always experience the exact same scenerio we played out in our head. And when it does happen, it is usually about something trivial or easy to foresee.

My point is that I am constantly in a state of deep imagination. Constantly trying to get away from where I physically am by transporting my mind to some dreamworld.

A place where I say all the right things and am excepted.

I’m not saying that this farm is boring or mundane enough that I would have to do this, but more in the sense that I am alone in a room full of people. Don’t get me wrong, they can be really awesome and fun and great to be around, but they are always leaving. The only person that stays consistent is my boss.

So I try not to get attached to many people here.

Although I have gotten better at putting these feelings to the side most of the time, like I said, I get lost in the waves of my own imagination. Dreaming of things that are too good to be true. Being tossed by tumoultuous memories.

Thank you, Dear Reader, for your patience. I will be writing about my latest farm endeavours soon. Like building a greenhouse inside of a greenhouse. Until then, cheers.

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